My grandparents used to bicker. My grandmother generally came out on top, as she was fierier. One time though, she was asking him to do a bunch of stuff, and he muttered: “If you’d lose some weight, you could do it yourself.” She fixed her gaze on him, and glowered: “I’m thinking of getting rid of about 200 lbs of useless fat immediately…” He replied “You’re going to cut off your foot?” (H/T: Acid Cow )
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